We Could Take on the World (Wide Web)
by ArwenisWholocked
Summary: What does a texting conversation look like among the Avengers? Here's an idea... A collection of texts sent between the Avengers team; post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier. POSSIBLE SPOILERS FOR ALL OF THE FILMS! Rated T for safety; the rating may drop to K sometime. (Cover image is not mine)
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Hiya, Chuck(s)! :D Welcome to one of the most ridiculous things I've ever done in my life… :P You got it, the AVENGERS ARE TEXTING! Yeah, this is my first Avengers fanfic (I'm writing one for Thor now), and it's really the first humour fanfic I've done. So wish me luck… And yes, this did at first come out a silly desire to write a viral fanfic with thousands of follows and reviews and stuff, but honestly, it's turning into a desire to write something that's complete crack, funny (I hope), and also something to focus on so I can get past my writer's block for the Thor fanfic ("Fallen God"). :3 But anyways, ENJOY! :D**_

_**-Arwen ;) **_

**Chapter 1: In Which Thor Discovers the Smartphone**

**Tony Stark**

**Thor | 2:26 pm**

ManOff IROn! I _**requisite**_ your assistancE

**JARVIS | 2:27 pm**

I apologise, Mr. Thor; Mr. Stark is currently in a meeting and cannot respond to your text message at this time. However, I will forward your message to him and he will respond at his leisure.

**Thor | 2:31 pm**

SoN of _**Steak**_, I fera I havfe been given te incorrect combination of digits by which I may _**correct**_ with you. It seems that I have instead contacted your disemboidied voice by which I am guided through your illustriouss tower. However;,. If you perchance receive this missive, I would seek your instruction regarding the operation of this '*mobile telephone"".! On Asgard, we do not have these intelligent phones; but I have found an interest in disckoveringhow such a device appears to have a miEnd of its own, for it corrects my statements without _**President**_ and replaces my words with meaningless phrases.: And I fear I cannot _**comprehended**_ the scarlet line which appears beneath my words, should they be incorre2ectly spelled.

**JARVIS | 2:32 pm**

I apologise, Mr. Thor; Mr. Stark is currently in a meeting and cannot respond to your text message at this time. However, I will forward your message to him and he will respond at his leisure.

**Thor | 2:32 pm**

I appear to agai21ne have used a faulty combination. I shall attempt to use a different grouping of these _**digitals**_.

**Tony Stark | 2:56 pm**

What the…? Since when did you have a phone?! And—oh, shoot. SERIOUSLY?! You're trying different numbers?

**Tony Stark | 2:58 pm**

This could be fun…

_**A/N: Haha, utter crack. Sheesh. So yeah, that's chapter one! Hope you liked it; I'll try to update it soon. This is sort of on the fly and has no plot or real rhyme or reason for existing… But hopefully you all will like this fanfic! :D As for the formatting, the bolded, italicised words are the ones that were autocorrected by Thor's phone, and the underlined words are the ones that are spelled wrong (which is pretty clear; and no, I don't spell that badly in real life). If at any point you're not sure what I meant when the phone autocorrects something, just let me know and I'll tell you. Also, I'm not using any specific phone OS; I'm kind of just making it up as I go along. :D**_

_**Please feel free to drop me ideas for conversations the Avengers could have with each other! :D**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: DUDE. I got like four followers in less than 24 hours. THIS IS AWESOME. THANK YOU! :DDD And yeah, that probably sounds lame (honestly, if you read "Syrgja" by Lady Charity, she had 100 followers (or reviews?) by chapter 6), but hey. :D I've never gotten this much attention. So this is cool. But yeah, CHECK OUT LADY CHARITY! She's amazing… and "Syrgja" is fantastic. I'm almost finished with it and I cried several times. And also Ordis and her fanfic "Drown"… they have a similar writing style, but both of the stories are fantastic. SO GO READ THEM! And maybe by the time you do that I'll be back from vacation and have updated this one and "Fallen God"…**_

_**One other thing: underneath the chapter titles in this fanfic are names; they denote whose phone is being looked at. Sorry if that was unclear…**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_

**Chapter 2: Of Death and High Heels**

**Clint Barton**

**Nat | 5:37 pm**

Which pair of heels should I get?

_**Image attached**_

**Clint | 5:39 pm**

They're both pretty lethal. You trying to commit suicide in style or something? Cos you're going to break your neck in those.

**Nat | 5:39 pm**

*rolls eyes* I think I know how to walk in heels, Barton.

**Clint | 5:40 pm**

Uh-huh. So what job is Fury sending you on?

**Nat | 5:43 pm**

Who says he's sending me anywhere? Aren't I allowed to go shopping for myself? And BTW, I'm getting the black pumps.

**Clint | 5:44 pm**

Hey, don't come haunting me from the grave when you kill yourself with your five inch heels. And you don't shop, Natasha.

**Nat | 5:44 pm**

Sure I do.

**Clint | 5:45 pm**

Seriously, what are you doing?

**Nat | 5:51 pm**

*sighs* Fine. I'm planning on modifying them. Did you look at those heels? You could stab someone with them. So why not use them as weapons?

**Clint | 5:52 pm**

I guess. It'd definitely be humiliating… The target would never live it down. "Yeah, I got taken out by a pair of high heels… Don't judge…"

**Nat | 5:53 pm**

:D Who said anything about living it down? Or living in general?

**Clint | 5:55 pm**

True… Either way, this had better not become a habit.

**Nat | 5:55 pm**

What?

**Clint | 5:56 pm**

You shopping… like… a girl or something.

**Nat | 5:58 pm**

I kind of AM a girl, Clint.

**Clint | 5:59 pm**

You know what I mean. A NORMAL girl.

**Nat | 6:02 pm**

…Thanks a lot, Barton…

**Clint | 6:03 pm**

:D This healthy dose of reality has been brought to you byyy…__HAWKEYE!

**Nat | 6:05 pm**

Shut up, Clint.

_**A/N: Lol, that was fun. :D I had to rewrite the end… I didn't like it much and it seemed kind of stupid and long-winded. Hopefully this one was better! :D I regret nothing… and apologise a little bit for my lame humour… XP Stick around, though! There might be a group text session soon! :D We shall see…**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: I'M BAAAAAAAAAACK! :DDD Did you miss me? Anyway, NEW CHAPTER! Can't wait for the next one… it took a while to write, but I really ended up liking it.**_

_**THANKS AGAIN FOR ALL THE SUPPORT! :D Seriously, you guys are SO AWESOME! :D**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_

**Chapter 3: Science Time**

**Bruce Banner**

_**Group Text to: **_**The Avengers**

**Tony | 11:36 am**

I still say you're wrong.

**Bruce | 11:36 am**

About what?

**Tony |11:38 am**

Our discussion this morning. It's obvious that shaking them works!

**Bruce | 11:39 am**

Are we seriously going to do this again…? It's a dry substance under high pressure. The molecules wouldn't be able to move.

**Tony |11:41 am**

Yeah, they can. They just can't move as easily, which creates more friction and static electricity. So it adds more charge.

**Bruce | 11:44 am**

…That's… FINE. It's POSSIBLE, I guess, but not necessarily plausible. But no matter how you do it, Stark, shaking the battery does NOT work better to keep the appliance going than you getting off your lazy backside and getting new batteries.

**Tony | 11:45 am**

:D Told you. And why should I? I've got Dummy. And Captain Pushover, too. Oldie needs to stop giving in to puppy dog eyes so easily.

**Steve | 11:47 am**

…You DO know I can see this text, right?

_**A/N: I know, I know, it's short… Sorry… But I'm a bit busy and the long one will take a while to type out. So bear with me; I'll have it soon. Plus, I need to start working on my next chapter for "Fallen God", which WILL UPDATE SOON! I'm sorry it's been a while… Anyway, see you soon! Read and review, please! **___

_**-Arwen ;)**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: 'Sup, people? I'm back with a new CHAPTAAAAAH! :DDD So far, this one is definitely my favourite, I think. :D And it's back by popular demand (i.e., one person asked)—Thor tries to text Iron Man! :O So this one is for the ever-awesome FlockPack. :D**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_

**Chapter 4: Lady Lazarus**

**Thor Odinson**

**Thor | 2:49 pm**

Mañ O0f IRON!?.; It is I, Thor, Son of Odin! Have I acquired the correct _**combustion **_of digits to facilitate our communication thrOuhg this ambulatory tela phon?

**Unknown (349-6244) | 2:53 pm**

OMG! IS THIS SRSLY THOR?! LIKE THE REAL PERSON THOR?! OMG TXT ME BK! CN WE MEET UP R SOMETHING?!

**Thor | 2:57 pm**

I beg your forgiveness, unknown individual;! iAprear to have mistakenly reached your ambulatory _**communion**_ device; I am seeking the contact of _**fiend **_Stark.

**Unknown (349-6244) | 2:58 pm**

ITS TOTES KAY! TXT ME SOON! UR LIKE TOTES MY FAV AVNGR! XOXO 3 3

**Thor | 2:59 pm**

Of course,;, I shail attempt to reach your device at another point in time.

**Unknown (349-9244) | 3:01 pm**

What? I'm sorry, but I think you've got a wrong number.

**Thor | 3:02 pm**

XP :O I fear#that this is becoming a pattern You must forgive me for this incoveni1enc3. ?Would you possibly have the correct numbers by which I may contact Tony, son of _**Steak**_.?.!?:

**Unknown (349-9244) | 3:04 pm**

I'm really confused…

**Thor | 3:05 pm**

I apologise. Fear not, our contaéct may now cease.

**Thor | 3:08 pm**

Son of _**Steak**_, i fear that I may never speAk to you in this manner. I long to find the correct way to reach your device;, but each of my attempts is foiled by the cruelty of my mistakes. I desire your counsel greatly, my friend; you, Son of _**Steak**_, are the only one whom I may ask, anId I would treasure your words asa lover his bride

**Lazarus (359-8522) | 3:12 pm**

What the…?! Is this some sort of joke?

**Thor | 3:13 pm**

Sighing. I beg your pardon, Lady Lazarus. You are not the intended recipient of my missive.

**Lazarus | 3:14 pm**

Lazarus is a guy's name, Thor… And that text sounded very… WRONG. Anyway, the number is 357-6242.

**Thor | 3:15 pm**

My fullest gratitude to you, Lord Lazarus! In an example of my thanks, I present you with these small but amusing images called emote icons. :D ;) 3

**Lazarus | 3:16 pm**

You're welcome. How did you get this number? It's on an exclusive network.

**Thor | 3:17 pm**

I do not understand. ARe our communications devices connected by a structure of snares?

**Lazarus | 3:19 pm**

…Something like that…

**Thor | 3:24 pm**

Lord Lazarus, I chortle with graet mirth! L O L! Ha! For I have found a strange coincidence. Your combination of digits is identical to that of the fallen warrior, Son of _**Coal**_! Amusing, is it not?

**Lazarus | 3:25 pm**

Yeah… haha…! You got me, I'm actually Coulson… Funny, right? Haha… Even funnier since it's true…

**Thor | 3:26 pm**

It brings me great amusement indeed.

**Thor | 3:27 pm**

Wait… what?!

**Lazarus | 3:28 pm**

…oops…

**Lazarus | 3:33 pm**

Haha… *facepalm* Welcome to Level 7.

_**A/N: Haha… there's my offering. XD Lame, I know… But I hope you enjoyed my sad sense of humour anyway. BTW, HUGE thank you to Cassodembreankia for her idea about Tony and Bruce discussing batteries! :D If you guys have any ideas for chapters, please let me know! :D Till next time!**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N: *looks at the date* Aw, crud, sorry, guys! **__** I know, I haven't been on in FOREVER. (Ok, not forever, but still, it's been a while.) So new chaptaaaaah! And yes, GROUP TEXT! YEAAAAAAAAAAH!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**-Gabe ;)**_

**Chapter 5: Revenge of the Fifth May Fourth on the Sixth**

**Tony Stark**

**Tony | 2:59 am**

Crud, whoops… May the Fourth be with you, guys.

**Steve | 3:02 am**

Mmad1j2;lk4

**Tony | 3:03 am**

And you, dude.

**Natasha | 3:05 am**

srsly, Stark? A, whyr u grp txting everyone in the _**meddle**_ of the night? Some of us like 2 sleep. And b, Star Wars is overrated.

**Tony | 3:08 am**

…That's hurtful. How could you say that about STAR WARS?!

**Tony | 3:09 am**

And please, like you're asleep. You're a SHIELD assassin; you guys are always up spying on people and poking your nose in everyone else's privacy and then shooting them.

**Clint | 3:14 am**

Pot calling the kettle black, Stark.

**Natasha | 3:15 am**

That's an understatement. And I'm awake NOW. I WAS asleep because I've got the day off tomorrow for once. But now I can't go back to sleep, so thanks for nothing.

**Bruce | 3:19 am**

It's too early, Tony… Go back to sleep.

**Tony | 3:21 am**

Hey. Unlike you lazies, I've been awake for the past two hours.

**Natasha | 3:24 am**

Only because you took a nap at 2 pm yesterday.

**Clint | 3:24 am**

Awww, that's cute.

**Tony | 3:25 am**

Sure thing, Tweety Bird. I'm at least being productive.

**Clint | 3:27 am**

…

**Tony | 3:28 am**

XD

**Clint | 3:28 am**

…

**Clint | 3:29 am**

…

**Bruce | 3:31 am**

Did he pass out or something?

**Clint | 3:32 am**

Seriously, Stark…? That's the lamest thing ever.

**Natasha | 3:33 am**

Grow up, Stark. Although Clint, quit being such a drama queen.

**Tony | 3:35 am**

XD In Clint's mind: ! #%! %

**Thor | 3:37 am**

GReetings, _**FIENDS**_. I SEE THAt that you havee awoken with great reluctance on this _**fined **_morning.

**Thor | 3:38 am**

Friend _**Steak**_, I do not understand the relevance or meaning of the strange symbols you have sent to us in your textual missive.

**Tony | 3:39 am**

Don't worry about it, Point Break. You're doing pretty well with the texting, dude. I can understand what you're saying, even.

**Clint | 3:41 am**

Yeah, nice work, Thor.

**Thor | 3:42 am**

My thanks, friends _**Steak **_and _**Baritone**_. Jane has assisted in explainging the various functions of this ambulatory communication device.

**Thor | 3:42 am**

Mobile phone.

**Steve | 3:45 am**

Morning, guys! Anyone up for a quick run? And quick question—remind me again why we text each other when we're all in Stark Tower? Tony does have an elevator so we can talk to each other.

**Clint | 3:47 am**

Are you kidding? I'm not riding the elevator up and down the tower just to talk to you all if I can use a phone. And it's Avengers Tower.

**Steve | 3:49 am**

Seems a little impersonal…

**Tony | 3:50 am**

Hey, it's still my tower! Just because you guys hang out on here doesn't mean you own it, too.

**Bruce | 3:51 am**

Come on, guys… it's too early to argue.

**Natasha | 3:54 am**

Yeah…

**Steve | 3:57 am**

Tony, it's the fifth… The fourth was yesterday.

**Tony | 3:58 am**

Same difference.

**Clint | 4:00 am**

Well then… REVENGE OF THE FIFTH. #likeaboss

**Thor | 4:02 am**

Is this revenge and fourth made in reference to a Midgardian holiday?

**Natasha | 4:03 am**

Long story.

**Bruce | 4:04 am**

Took six movies to explain it.

**Tony | 4:04 am**

Hey, then we'll make it a movie night tonight. You'll love it, Thor. Lots of spacey stuff and fighting and weird accents.

**Clint | 4:05 am**

A long time ago…

**Bruce | 4:06 am**

In a galaxy far, far away…

**Clint | 4:06 am**

Luuuuuke… I am your FATHER…

**Natasha | 4:05 am**

*groans* Noooo.

**Tony | 4:05 am**

*smirks* Trekkie.

**Natasha | 4:06 am**

:D Live long and prosper, Stark. :D

_**A/N: Yeah, this is what happens when I get bored of chem… :P So I hope you enjoy this! Sorry it's a day late… :3 Anyway, REVENGE OF THE SIXTH! (Because it's both.) And BTW, I am by all means a Star Warsian (Yeah, I just made up a name for the fandom. #likeaboss), not a Trekkie. (I do like the new movies, but that's about all I know about Star Trek.)**_

_**May the Force be with you… always.**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_

_**P.S. LOKI AND THE WINTER SOLDIER MIGHT COME! LMK IF YOU WANT THEM! I may add them anyway. XD**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N: Yo, peeps. Wuttup. Shtuff. XD Ok, I'm being lame today because I've got writer's block AGAIN for "Fallen God"… I have a chapter idea, and I started on it, but I have no idea what to do now. *headdesk* And now I have another story idea that I really want to try, but I refuse to start another project while I'm stuck with "Fallen God" (because I guarantee that FG will end up falling to the wayside, which I would hate to see happen…). So hopefully my writer's block will go away and I'll get some new ideas so I can start the other one and work on all three of my MCU stories at once. :P**_

_** Also, I'M BRINGING IN LOKI AND THE WINTER SOLDIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER! YAAAAAAY! Can't wait! So it won't be until the next chapter that they come in as full-blown characters, but I'm definitely bringing them along for the ride. :D Thanks for your feedback; I'm including them for you guys especially. :D**_

_** Again, to all of the people who have read, reviewed, favourited, and/or followed, THANK YOU SO MUCH! I really love hearing from you guys, and I keep getting taken by surprise by the amount of response this story is actually getting. :D**_

_** Enjoy!**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_

**Chapter 6: Fan Art Freakout**

**Tony Stark**

**Steve | 7:47 pm**

Have you guys ever looked up Avengers fan art? Some of it's really cool.

**Natasha | 7:48 pm**

Hey, you're expanding your horizons with the internet! Good job. :D

**Natasha | 7:49 pm**

And yes, I have. It's… interesting, at times…

**Tony | 7:52 pm**

Oh, heck yeah. It can get pretty scary. Like there's this one that I found on tumblr the other day; I've got a link around here somewhere… You'll totally freak out, Gramps.

_**Image attached**_

**Clint | 7:53 pm**

…The heck?! #ingrainedinyourbrain

**Natasha | 7:53 pm**

*pukes*

**Bruce | 7:53 pm**

…

**Thor | 7:54 pm**

Is such… questionableartwo3k tradiTI1Onal among the people of Midgard?:2

**Steve | 7:54 pm**

Seriously, Tony? That was uncalled for.

**Tony | 7:55 pm**

XD XD You asked, Cap.

**Clint | 7:58 pm**

No, Steve asked if you'd seen Avengers fan art. YOU decided to take it to the nth degree.

**Tony | 8:00 pm**

Hey, at least Steve now knows that fan art isn't all fine and dandy. He would've figured it out soon enough.

**Bruce | 8:01 pm**

GUys, enough, pelease? I dont think you guys want to be responsible for any _**oft**_ he damage that might result if you keep it up.

**Natasha | 8:02 pm**

Point taken.

**Steve | 8:03 pm**

Sorry, Bruce.

**Bruce | 8:04 pm**

Thank you.

**Clint | 8:07 pm**

Hey, Steve, you ought to put some of your artwork out on the web. You've got some cool stuff, dude.

**Steve | 8:07 pm**

Thanks! I might do that.

**Tony | 8:08 pm**

Ooh, I found another good one…

**Clint | 8:09 pm**

NO.

**Natasha | 8:09 pm**

NO.

**Thor | 8:09 pm**

NO.

**Bruce | 8:10 pm**

NO.

**Steve | 8:10 pm**

NO.

**Tony | 8:11 pm**

Alright, already! Sheesh. It wasn't even that bad! See?

_**Image attached**_

**Steve | 8:11 pm**

STARK!

**Thor | 8:12 pm**

Is this an image of LOKI?! And is heE being portrayed as a FEMALE?! LK

**Natasha | 8:12 pm**

tony wheres dumy i think I might have thrwon upa bit

**Bruce | 8:13 pm**

;ljkawe! #$AA

**Clint | 8:18 pm**

Nice work, stupid. Bruce is down here Hulking out. Thanks a lot.

**Steve | 8:19 pm**

*sighs* I'll take care of it.

**Tony | 8:21 pm**

Seriously, Romanoff?! You'd better not've stained my carpet. And you guys are such drama queens. It's just weird artwork!

**Steve | 8:22 pm**

It's INAPPROPRIATE, Stark. Now suit up and help before the Hulk gets out of control.

**Tony | 8:23 pm**

I don't take orders, Rogers.

**Natasha | 8:24 pm**

You got us into this, Tony, you help get us out.

**Tony | 8:25 pm**

Fine, I'm going.

_**Image attached**_

**Natasha | 8:26 pm**

So help me, Stark, I am going to rip your intestines out and shove them down your throat.

**Steve | 8:26 pm**

Enough, already!

**Thor | 8:27 pm**

Son of _**Steak**_, this is no longer amusing. I demand that these images cease.

**Clint | 8:27 pm**

Tony! Get a hint and for crying out loud, SHUT UP!

**Bruce | 8:27 pm**

Asl;jk325!  $J:L$! LJ:

**Tony | 8:28 pm**

Oh my gosh, you guys, can't you take a stupid joke?!

**8:29 pm**

_**Thor Odinson, Bruce Banner, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, and Clint Barton have left the conversation.**_

**Tony | 8:29 pm**

…Apparently not.

**8:42 pm**

_**Silvertongue has joined the conversation.**_

**Silvertongue | 8:42 pm**

Well… this is interesting. :D

_**A/N: TADA! Another lame attempt at being funny. SILVATONGUE. XD Ok, I seriously was sorely tempted to make his name "Mr Silvertongue", but that's plagiarism because that's JARVIS' name for Loki in **_**Drown**_**by Ordis (CHECK HER OUT! OMGL SHE IS AMAZING).**_ _**But I hope you enjoyed it! Like I said, Loki won't fully appear until the next chapter, and I'm not sure when the WS will come in, but they will arrive. :D And there may be guest appearances from people like Pepper, DARCY (:DDD Because Darcy is too funny for words), and maybe Jane. (Honestly, I really don't like Jane. I don't know why, but something about her gets on my nerves.) But that's all to come!**_

_** Now, to figure out "Fallen God" and to one day do my math test… :3**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hello! So today is a monumental day… TODAY… I HAVE… *drum roll*…**

…**Written possibly the longest author's note in history because it's late and I like to ramble. :P But anyway…**

**Friends, fangirls, and Fandom-men, I address you on this not-really-that-momentous-day to bring you a message from its Highness, The Bottom of My Heart. And thus, the missive follows:**

**THANK YOU!**

** Ok, so this is really off the cuff and random, but I just went through another 10 notifications of new followers and reviews, and I am just overwhelmed by how awesome you all are. Gallifrey… *cries* You guys seriously are the best, and thank you SOOOO much for everything! I read every single one of your reviews and I love them, and I know I've sent PMs to you guys to say thanks and such, but still, it never seems like enough. So from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU ALL SOOOO MUCH! I love you guys; you're going to make me cry… Ok, not really. XD But you people are seriously amazing. :D**

** Also, update on things: as for the description of this story, I probably should take out the post CA:TWS qualifier… I'm really just writing this story in the MCU without paying much attention to what's happened and such. So while there will likely be current characters from the most recent movies and such, the events are kind of at any random time. So sorry if that was a bit confusing… because technically, Loki shouldn't be able to text anybody or wreak havoc on anything since he's undercover and stuff, but he's here anyway and I can't find a good explanation as to why he'd blow his cover just to text Thor and get on the Avenger's nerves. :P Thus, this story is more of a timeless fanfic that just happens. (I hope that makes sense, because it does when I say it in my brain but not when I read it out loud.)**

** Also, I mentioned bringing in the Winter Soldier at some point… that may be a while, just because I honestly have NO clue how he'd act, considering the events of Cap 2. I don't really like writing characters that I don't really know much about because I'm always worried that they'll end up being very OOC; thus, the WS may be only an occasionally recurring character (as opposed to Loki, who may very well become a regular).**

** Another thing: I AM TAKING REQUESTS! :D If you guys have chapter ideas or anything you'd like to see happen in this story, please let me know! I may not use EVERY idea, such as directions the story could go—mainly because this story isn't meant to have a plot; it's just for fun and is also meant to be a sort of stress ball type thing for when I have a funny idea and when I get writer's block on other stories. But I'm open to ideas; I love those things. :D**

** Ok, what else… Besides the fact that this author's note is ridiculously long… Yeah. Just thanks sooo much to all of you guys! :D You make my day. :D**

** Cass: Thanks! :D Loki is definitely going to be fun to write; I love that guy… I've done his serious side in "Fallen God" (sorry about all the self-advertising, but that's my magnum opus if you don't count WCTW3), but it'll be fun to have his more mischievous, funny side on here. And thanks for your sympathy… Writer's block sucks. Especially when it keeps coming back for a couple of days, going away, and then coming back… XP**

** Guest: Thanks! Will do, hopefully, if my stupid AP doesn't kill me…**

** The Writer Es and RaphaelplusMikey: I PMed you, so I won't bother talking anymore on here and running my mouth more than is necessary. XD**

**UPDATE: OH MY GALLIFREY, I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SORRY! I know it's been absolutely ages, and I'm just going to blame it all on school, but I feel absolutely awful for leaving you all for so long! *cries* And I will get back to Fallen God soon, so stay tuned.**

**7**

_**Text Conversation with Avengers group**_

**Steve | 11:09 am**

Alright, fess up. Who did it?

**Tony | 11:12 am**

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar…?

**Natasha | 11:13 am**

-.- Did what?

**Steve | 11:15 am**

Someone replaced my background picture on my phone with a moving picture of Stark posing in his bathing suit dancing and saying "I'm sexy and I know it".

**Tony | 11:16 am**

Well, I am.

**Clint | 11:18 am**

Can it, Stark. It wasn't me, at any rate; I haven't seen anyone except Nat all day.

**Bruce | 11:21 am**

Yeah, I've been with Tony all day, and I don't think he was near Steve's phone. So I doubt he did it, even though I wouldn't put it past him.

**Tony | 11:22 am**

Right. But kudos to whoever did it; it was a brilliant idea.

**Steve | 11:24 am**

Well, it didn't change itself, did it? And Thor's back in Asgard for a political engagement, so obviously he didn't do it. So come on, whose idea was it?

**Silvertongue | 11:25 am**

Oh, for Odin's sakes, is this HONESTLYhow this is going to play out? You all are simply pathetic, although I have no reason to be surprised. You are, after all, Midgardians.

**Tony | 11:25 am**

A fsdjk;l! $ …

_**Message censored**_

**Silvertongue | 11:26 am**

How very eloquent of you, Stark.

**Tony | 11:33 am**

Dang it. If this is the jerk I think it is, you get to pay for the rack of test tubes Bruce just broke. And you can pay for the holes the acid in the tubes burned through my flooring.

**Bruce | 11:34 am**

_**Howie **_diaeD he get on Here SOMEone had better startatew explaining, or else hesgoing to be _**paging**_ for a lot more than just a few Peiwces of glass

**JARVIS | 11:35 am**

I'm afraid I must inform you that there has been a security breech, detected at approximately 11:34:59 am; my protocols were overridden at approximately 10:28:32 am. A certain "Mr Silvertongue" is waiting in Mr Stark's sitting room on floor 28.

**Natasha | 11:38 am**

Oh, RIGHT! NOW he tells us! I'm on my way down; you all had better be there before me.

**Silvertongue | 11:40 am**

Do you always treat your guests with such pomp and circumstance? And such immense courtesy, too! Am I blushing?

**Steve | 11:42 am**

Loki, if you're smart, you'll stop talking before someone stops your talking FOR you. Is ANYONE down there yet?!

**Silvertongue | 11:45 am**

KIndly calOOFF your archer!  I1  $isstrangling me _**honesty**_ the _**beast**_ m 1ethod ofmurder heeee can think o? 

**Natasha | 11:52 am**

I'm here and so are Clint, Tony, and Bruce. Steve, can you hurry up and get here? Bring back up.

**Natasha | 11:54 am**

And for gosh's sakes, will someone PLEASE get Loki off of his phone?!

_**A/N: Ok, so this one wasn't very funny… Honestly, I wasn't quite sure what to do with this. I wanted to bring Loki in, but I wasn't quite sure how. Hopefully you guys won't kill me for giving you a "meh" chapter after having been gone so long… *drops to a muted whisper while casting furtive glances around* …and when I won'tbebackforanotherweekorso pleasedon'tkillme!**_

_***sighs* Yeah, I know… I'm sorry. I'm going on vacation, so I can't update until I get home. But I do plan on working on chapter ideas! So stay tuned; hopefully I'll have something for you soon after**_ _**I get home! Thanks again for all of your fantastic support; it's so much more than I dreamed of. :D**_

_**Love,**_

_**Arwen ;)**_


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N: Erlo! How's it hanging, people? So I'm back with a new chapter! Hope you like it; I literally just came up with the idea about 10 seconds ago. I'm not kidding. Goes to show how much I plan ahead… XP**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_

**8**

**Natasha Romanoff**

_**Text Conversation with Avengers Group**_

**Tony | 12:59 pm**

GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAL!

**Steve | 1:00 pm**

Holy cow, you guys, did you see that?! That kick was insane!

**Natasha | 1:02 pm**

It would be greatly appreciated if you would quit spamming everyone with updates from the World Cup game. SOME of us actually have jobs.

**Bruce | 1:03 pm**

Come on up, Natasha; you're missing a great game. The paperwork will hold for an hour.

**Clint | 1:05 pm**

You should, Nat; it's a blast up here, but Pepper needs some support. She's the only girl here. You're not missing anything right now; it's at halftime, so we can fill you in on what you missed.

**Thor | 1:06 pm**

Lady Nata sha, I too would appreciate your _**presents**_ with us as we watch this gmae of fooot ball. I do not _**understatement**_ the game ENTirely, and if you are familiar with the sport, I would appreciate yro exp;anation of it. Nevertheless, our team spirit will remain if you are unable to join us.

**Pepper | 1:09 pm**

You should come up, Natasha; I can help you go through the paperwork later to make up for the lost time. I think you'll have a blast up here.

**Natasha | 1:11 pm**

…Fine. But you all had better explain to Fury if I miss anything important with SHIELD because of this.

**Thor | 1:11 pm**

Excellent! We are commingling in the _**Maine **_lounge on floro 23.

**Silvertongue | 1:13 pm**

Well, this seems like a good enough time to gatecrash…

**Bruce | 1:14 pm**

Every time. Every stinking time I start to have fun, HEesh ows up. Go awa, loki, _**uncles **_u wnt you1 r face bashed in.

**Silvertongue | 1:17 pm**

Once again, I am staggered by your hospitality and courtesy towards me. Would anyone mind telling me which team is which? I can't distinguish them by their coloured tunics.

**Tony | 1:18 pm**

Since when did you care about soccer? BTW, Thor, it's SOCCER, not football. Football is with a pigskin.

**Thor | 1:19 pm**

A pigskin…? I do not follow. Do Midgardians trul y make sport with the hide of a swine?

**Tony | 1:19 pm**

*facepalm* It's official, Thor. You're hopeless.

**Pepper | 1:20 pm**

Stop being rude, Tony. Thor, a pigskin is another word for an American football. Remember the games you watched at Thanksgiving with Bruce and Tony?

**Silvertongue | 1:22 pm**

A curious tradition, I must admit. What, exactly, is the point of a game in which the players hurl themselves at each other, breaking bones and bashing heads, all to get to the other end of the field?

**Steve | 1:23 pm**

Not to play devil's advocate here, but I have to side with Loki on this one.

**Thor | 1:25 pm**

Brother, I _**now**_ not what you mean to do herse, or how yohave come into this conversation. Nevertheless, if ou can control your mischievous behaviours,,I would invite you to _**joint **_us in our observation of this World Cup game.

_**New texting conversation with Bruce Banner, Thor Odinson, Natasha Romanoff, Pepper Potts, Tony Stark, Clint Barton, and Steve Rogers**_

**Bruce | 1:28 pm**

WHAT?!

**Natasha | 1:29 pm**

Thor, we can't trust him and you KNOW that!

**Clint | 1:29 pm**

Where's my bow?

**Tony | 1:30 pm**

What the heck, Thor?! This is MY tower, and I say he can't come up here.

**Steve | 1:31 pm**

HEY! Maybe we should give him a chance. There's a ton of us here. We've beaten Loki before; if we need to, we can do it again.

**Pepper | 1:32 pm**

Steve's right. JARVIS says that Loki has been hiding out in the tower for the past two days; he just doesn't know where. If Loki wanted us dead or COULD kill us, he'd have done it by now.

**Thor | 1:34 pm**

I must confess, my brother iws indeed untrustworthy. I therefore understand your relcutance to accept him into _**hour**_ circles. Nevert heless, I would like to give Loki a chance. Furthermore, my _**farther**_ has placed powerful _**words**_ and enchantments on Loki to resturct his magic to small spells or violent behoaviour with an ankelt that only I or the Allfather can remove. Loki will be unable to harm us.

**Tony | 1:35 pm**

*sighs* Fine. But YOU are paying for any and all damage or funeral costs, and I want a full explanation as to how Loki was able to get to Earth in the first place and to get into my tower.

**Thor | 1:35 pm**

In answer to your question, Heimdall may have allowerd him to come toEarth, perceiving that Loki would not be a _**grape**_ threat. Loki si, however, cunnig with even a small amount of spells, and probably enetered ths Tower by manipulating a small _**a mound**_ of magic and a limited knowledge of Midgardian technology.

**Clint | 1:36 pm**

Thanks, Thor; I feel SO reassured now.

**Steve | 1:37 pm**

Come on, guys; we should at least give it a try.

**Natasha | 1:38 pm**

I don't like it.

**Steve | 1:38 pm**

None of us does, but we can at least show a bit of mercy by giving Loki a shot.

**Bruce | 1:39 pm**

Alright; just so long as someone BESIDES me pays for the damage if I Hulk out. I'll try not to, but I can't make any promises.

**Thor | 1:39 pm**

I understand. Thank you, my friends.

_**Texting conversation with Avengers Group**_

**Thor | 1:41 pm**

Loki, we once again would invite you to join us in the observation if this game.

**Silvertongue | 1:42 pm**

So you've all decided not to murder me if I do?

**Tony | 1:42 pm**

Don't push your luck, Rudolph. You've infiltrated my tower, hacked my texting conversations, messed with Steve's phone (*coughnicejobonthatoneactuallycough*), and now you've made me miss the first seven minutes of the second half. So if you're watching, don't expect any niceties from me.

**Silvertongue | 1:44 pm**

Thank you for your warm welcome. I shall join you presently.

_**Silvertongue has left the conversation.**_

**Steve | 1:45 pm**

See? That wasn't so bad. Now will someone PLEASE explain to me why we're texting each other from two inches away?

_**A/N: Tadaaaaaaa! Not as funny as usual (again), but I figured I'd set some groundwork on this. I figured I'd do a bit of World Cup stuff in spirit of the games (ENGLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND FOREVAAAAAAAAAH), so I hope you enjoyed it! And it's FOOTBALL, not soccer. (I'm an extremely unpatriotic American, I know. XD) But anyway, there you are! I'm not crazy about this chapter, so I may do another one soon to make up for it. So stay tuned! Again, I take suggestions for chapter ideas! Those are really helpful for when my brain freezes up… lol.**_

_**Thanks again to everyone who's read, followed, favourited, reviewed, etc. :D You all are AWESOME!**_

_**-Arwen ;)**_


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